G-Spot: Start the Stimulation

 

What's the G stands for?

Before it was officially named by the scientific community, the G-spot was referred to in research and literature as a sensitive spot on the front wall of the vagina or as a spongy tissue surrounding the urethra. In a 1950 article, German gynecologist Ernest Grafenberg became the first sex researcher to clearly identify this sensitive spot and its location. He was also the first to document female ejaculation, although he didn't call it that. When sex researchers Beverly Whipple and John D. Perry began publishing their research on the subject in scientific and medical journals, they decided to name the spot after Grafenberg, and that is how it came to be known as the G-spot. Whipple and Perry put the G-spot on the map, so to speak, and their book with Alice Ladas, The G Spot, brought the spot and female ejaculation into popular consciousness.

The G-Spot

A woman's urethra is about 2 inches long and is surrounded by spongy erectile tissue that contains paraurethral glands and ducts.

The spongy tissue makes up the urethral sponge, also known as the G-spot. Let's clear up any misconceptions right away: every woman has a G-spot. The only thing that may vary is the size and location of the "spot," and how sensitive it is. Because it develops from the same embryologic tissue as the male prostate gland and produces fluid similar to prostatic fluid, the G-spot is often thought of as the female prostate.

Finding the G-Spot

The G-spot is located behind the pubic bone, around the urethra, and can be felt through the front wall of the vagina, about two inches inside the vaginal opening. The size of the spot varies—Perry and Whipple say from a dime to a half-dollar.8 Opinions differ about the actual size of the G-spot, because, like the clitoris, the G-spot is connected to a network of nerves and tissue, so it's sometimes hard to say where it begins and where it ends. What we do know is that many women find a spot a few inches inside the vagina on the front wall to be very sensitive to stimulation and pressure. One thing to keep in mind as you begin the journey to find your own G-spot or your lover's is that the G-spot tends to swell when a woman is aroused. As it swells, it becomes a firm area that should be easy to distinguish from the rest of the vaginal wall. Swelling can take place very quickly or more slowly, depending on the woman. It is much easier to locate the G-spot once a woman is turned on. You might think the G-spot is "missing" if you look for it when its owner isn't aroused.

How will you know when you've found it? Many people who've had the honor to touch a G-spot or two say that it feels spongy and slightly more textured (many people describe it as ridged) than the smoother-tissued area around it. When it is swollen, it protrudes slightly. Remember that the G-spot is not on the front wall of the vagina, rather it can be felt through the wall. Because you are feeling it through the vaginal wall, you need to apply a significant amount of deliberate pressure. A light touch just won't do much for the G-spot. If it's someone else's G-spot you're looking for, one way to know if you've found it is by the reaction of your partner. Many times when you look for it, you'll know you hit it because you're partner will squeal, 'Yes! Right there!"

Having Your G-Spot Stimulated

When their G-spots are stimulated, many, if not most, women feel the urge to pee. That makes sense because you're putting pressure on the sponge around the urethra, which connects to the bladder. For some women, the urge to pee is an arousing sensation; they know they are not actually going to pee, so the feeling registers pleasure (rather than stress and anxiety) in the brain. Some women actually feel slightly turned on when they have to pee. Personally, I feel pressure around my urethra (as if someone's working my G-spot) when I have to piss, and it feels good. But when the entire genital region is engorged, with blood rushing to all the right areas, pressure on the urethra may be an entirely different sensation than when you're in a non-aroused state. Instead of feeling just the urge to pee, the entire area is electric with nerve endings, sensitive and alive. In other words, in this state, the pee feeling isn't like being stuck in a car in traffic and having to go really, really bad. That sucks. Instead, you're more aware of your entire genital region and the pressure on your urethra feels good.

A woman's response to G-spot stimulation (and any other erotic stimulation, for that matter) can also change. There are some times when G-spot pressure feels great, orgasmic, out of this world, and other times when the "spot" feels overly sensitive, too delicate for pressure, or it just doesn't feel good. In some cases, if you're not fully aroused to the point where the sponge has swelled, the sensation can change from pleasurable to just annoying. This strikes me as similar to stimulation of the clitoral glans (which makes sense since both are made of erectile tissue): if the clitoris hasn't become completely engorged with blood and swollen, and has retreated behind the hood, some-times direct stimulation—which normally feels great—feels too overwhelming. So, if your first experience with G-spot stimulation doesn't float your boat, you may want to try it again.

Keep in mind that you can dislike the "I'm gonna pee my pants" feeling but still enjoy G-spot stimulation. You just need to reassure yourself that you are not actually going to urinate, and surrender to the sensations. For some women, a full bladder or any pressure near the urethra is uncomfortable and irritating. For them, pressure on the G-spot often feels too sensitive, too unpleasant, and these women do not enjoy G-spot stimulation.

G-Spot Tools & Techniques

When it comes to G-spot stimulation, you have a number of 

options in the tool department. Fingers have an excellent advantage for this particular activity. For one, they are the best at being able to find the spot, since our sense of touch is keen and connected right back to the brain. Fingers are diligent and talented little explorers, and I recommend that beginners always start with them. When using these little gems, remember that light touch doesn't work when it comes to the G-spot, you need to be direct and consistent with the pressure you apply to the G-spot. One of the best techniques to use with the fingers is the "come here" approach. With your fingers inside your partner and against the wall of the vagina, make a "come here" motion (toward you) with your fingers, almost like you are trying to pull the spot out of her. Some people also like to "dig" at the spot, but you better make sure your nails are well manicured or covered with a latex glove so you don't do any actual damage. Experiment with how much pressure, penetration, and movement she likes—ask her which techniques feel the best to her.

If you and your partner practice fisting (penetration with the whole hand), chances are some part of your hand will find the G-spot even if you aren't looking for it because her vagina will be so full. With your hand inside her, palm up with fingers curled down, you can use all four fingers to pull and stimulate the G-spot. Another technique I recommend for all you fisters out there is to turn your hand so that your thumb faces up and your fingers are curled to the left (this applies to right-handed people, reverse it for left-handers). Then, if you simply move your fist in and out of her, the knuckles of your thumb will press against the G-spot.

Since the sex-toy industry has gotten much more savvy about women's pleasure, there are a number of dildos and vibrators designed with the G-spot in mind. In contrast to the traditional straight-as-an-arrow phallic shape, look for a very pronounced curve on a dildo or vibrator. These toys may have G-spot in their names or you can ask a sex-toy store employee for a recommendation.

Some women prefer a toy that's rock hard, since the G-spot responds to firm pressure. The Crystal Wand is an acrylic dildo created and marketed especially for G-spot stimulation and female ejaculation. Its unique shape—a perfect "S"—takes the concept of curves to a whole new level. Many women have told me that they had trouble locating their G-spots until they dis-covered the Crystal Wand. The combination of a rigid material and exaggerated curve may do the trick for you.

With any G-spot toys, make sure you work your way up to them with finger penetration first, and use plenty of lube. In-and-out movement with firm pressure will wake up that G-spot and make her sing. You may also want to try pressing the toy against the spot and using a pulling motion. Remember that you don't have to insert the entire length of toys that are five or six inches long—the G-spot is just a few inches inside. A steady rhythm and strong pressure will feel good, and the more aroused a woman becomes, the better it should feel.

Unfortunately for all you guys, the penis has a slight disadvantage when it comes to being a G-spot ace. No, it's not impossible to stimulate the G-spot with your cock, it's just a little more difficult. The shape of each cock is unique, but most men were not born with the dramatic curve ideal for this type of stimulation. But fear not, here's some advice to make you all expert G-spotters. It's all about getting the right angle, and that angle may depend on you and your lover's particular bodies and how they line up with one another in different positions. First, remember that the G-spot is not all the way inside the vagina, but only a few inches in. Fully penetrating her pussy, which may feel wonderful for all parties concerned, is not the best way to achieve G-spot stimulation. Instead, try entering her less than all the way; how far inside will vary, depending on the size of her vagina and the length of your cock. With the head of your cock, aim for that spot on the front wall as you move in and out of her. You may want to guide your penis with your hand in the beginning for better control. She can also help by directing you once you're inside.

While we are so diligently focused on the G-spot, let us not forget about the clitoris! Some women prefer G-spot stimulation by itself, while others appreciate both at once. Because all the nerves and tissues are connected, they play off one other, help-ing the entire genital region become stimulated. Many women find that simultaneous external and internal stimulation is like hitting the spot from both sides.

Positions to Hit the Spot

Because of where the G-spot is located (behind the front wall of the vagina), body position and the angle of penetration are important factors. Doggie-style position or a variation of it, with the head down and butt in the air, puts the body at an ideal angle and makes the spot easily accessible to a partner's fingers, a toy, or a penis. If your partner is behind you, he should aim downward and use a pulling motion toward himself.

If you like being on your back, the spot might be a little tougher to find. Gravity can work against you. Try putting your legs up and to your chest. Or put a pillow under your butt to get a better angle. For those of you limber wonders, go ahead, show off and put your legs to your shoulders. Getting on top can afford you control over the angle of penetration, and you can simply tilt your body or rock your hips to find the perfect position.

Can you find your own G-spot? Yes, but it's not as easy as you may think. You'll probably have to experiment with different masturbatory positions before you find the one that works best for you. Women I know who can reach their own G-spots like to lie on their stomachs, squat (not very easy on the knees), lie on their backs with a pillow underneath their ass, or try solo doggie-style. Some women can stand and move their hips back to better reach it. Don't be alarmed if you can't reach it; the angle really does make it difficult to self-stimulate. Try a curved vibrator or dildo, which will be easier to maneuver and angle than your own hand. Or ask your lover to go on a little G-spot expedition with you; when someone else lends a hand, I bet you'll find the treasure, and won't getting there be fun!