The Art of Pleasing Orally (Part II)

The Art of Cunnilingus

(or How to Eat Pussy)

 

Introduction

This section is for men who want learn how to properly eat a woman's pussy, or who've heard that it might not be all that bad to put their face down there, and for women who want to get their man to eat them period, improvement in performance can come later.

Most of the women know what they like, and have had all too many experiences with men who didn't seem to have the vaguest idea what they were doing between her legs.

Eating a woman's pussy is about the most wonderful thing you can do for her. It makes her feel loved, admired, sexy, and of course it makes her cum like crazy. Many women prefer it to intercourse, and for most, it's the easiest way to cum with a man. You may have the littlest cock on the planet, but if you give great head, you'll be appreciated as a fabulous lover. Yes, it's that important. Besides, lots of women expect it these days so you might as well get to know what you're doing. Studies show that 90 percent of married couples under 25 give head and for couples over 50, at least 55 percent of the men are eating pussy, with 95 percent of the men and 82 percent of the women enjoying it.

Many guys seem to have a strange love/hate relationship with women's genitalia. Guys that can't wait to get their cock into one are often reluctant to put their face "down there." For every guy who says he loves to eat pussy, there's another one who's squeamish. Women know this, and it affects their ability to lie back and enjoy the experience.

This is for you gals. Before you can get him to eat pussy for the first time, you need to get him worked up about the idea, that is, get him to think about sex for a few minutes, but don't do anything to make him cum yet. He's got a sex switch in his brain that turns on when he sees a woman, especially a naked one, and turns off as soon as he cums, this is why who does what first can be very important in the beginning, less so as the two of you mature. Fortunately, it won't take much to get him to eat you the first time, just undress and ask him to, let him look at your pussy for a while, show him your clit and let him play with it, promise him a good fuck afterwards or a blowjob if you've read the second section, if he seems the least bit interested straddle his head and rub your bush over his face.

What's Down There?

This is for you guys. Most men don't really know what they've been sticking their cock into. Many women also don't appreciate what they have, and can't understand why a man would think that it was beautiful, let alone want to put his face in it.

Why would a man like to eat pussy? Most men I know who really love women and want make having sex with them a joint endeavor rather than a conquest, also like to eat pussy. They don't want to just eat her, they want to bring her to a great climax and then build her up for a fuck that neither will forget, or maybe get a good blowjob if that's what she wants to do. I think that there are two basic reasons. First, many men want to give their woman the most sexual satisfaction they can, they enjoy pleasing her and will go to great lengths to do so, the more their woman likes what they are doing to her, the harder their cocks get until sometimes they cum just from eating her. The second is the role that the mouth, tongue, taste and smell play in sex. Why do people kiss? They receive pleasure from the interaction that takes place during a kiss. The mouth, lips and tongue are some of the more erogenous zones of the body and are active rather than passive, you do something with them. You nibble on her ears, kiss and suck on her nipples, kiss her navel, why not kiss and suck on the most sexual part of her body, her pussy.

The tastes and odors of the fresh secretions from a clean healthy woman's pussy are also erotic to many men. Put this all together and your mouth in her pussy is where it's at guys.

Now that you've got your woman out of the shower, on the bed, and fairly well warmed up (or she's got you there), stop and look at what you see. Leave the lights on, or get a flashlight or something, so that you can examine her carefully. Take a good look at what's between her legs. Beautiful, isn't it? There's nothing that makes a woman more unique than her pussy. I know. I've seen plenty of them. They come in all different sizes, colors and shapes; some are tucked inside like a little girl's cunnie and some have thick luscious lips that come out to greet you. Some are nested in brushes of fur and others are covered with transparent fuzz.

The first thing you see is her muff. It should be the same color as the rest of her hair but who knows these days. It has a slightly different texture than the hair on her head and can cover a large or small area but usually just up over the mons area, that fleshy mound over her pelvic bone, and down each side of her pussy to its lower end. It usually does not spread out to her thighs and has sparse growth partially onto the outer lips.

Don't worry, looking at it won't make you go blind. Nestled in the midst of her muff are the outer, or major, lips of her pussy (they are vertical on all women). They are not overly sensitive to touch on the outside (but it's a good place to start), about the same as the shaft of your cock. They extend from the upper part of the hood that covers her clit to more or less the bottom of her pussy. They're thick and luscious in the middle and thin out at each end blending into her body. Some are almost closed while others are open to varying extents, allowing the inner pleasures to peep through. They don't generally come together completely at the top, exposing the upper cone of the clitoral hood, and less so at the bottom, giving you a glimpse of the bottom of the vaginal entrance where the lower parts of the inner lips surround it.

Underneath the outer lips are the inner, or minor, lips. These are much thinner, more sensitive and fun to play with. At the top they form the cone-shaped hood that protects the sensitive clit, closing in under the clit and then coming back out to continue down to the bottom of the vaginal entrance. They tend to blossom out between the outer lips, especially near the bottom.

Between the underside of the clit and the bottom of the vaginal opening lies the vestibule, your new playground. Although the clit's hood is a part of the inner lips, they appear to only cover the vestibule. The urethra and vagina open into the vestibule. Excluding the obvious first place role of the clit, it's the vestibule and the entrance to the vagina where a lot of the action takes place.

I've saved the best for last, the clitoris or clit, accent on the first syllable. Most of you know it, but for those who don't, it's THE woman's sex organ, period. It may feel great to be fucked vaginally or otherwise, but if the stimulation isn't right there, on the clit, you're ignoring the place that's going to make her cum, and presumably that's why you're reading this, right? It's right there at the top juncture of her inner lips, a small knob of pink flesh. This is where it's at boys, and don't forget it. Almost any licking and sucking of the labia or vaginal entrance are going to feel just dandy; just remember that's pleasurable, teasing, not the main event. I can't tell you how many guys have thrust their tongues up my cunt thinking that that was going to make me cum. They were wrong. Of course, with a little manual stimulation . . . but I'm getting ahead of myself.

Women feel differently about how much direct stimulation they can take on their clit. Some women will adore it if you suck hard on their exposed clits, others will shriek in pain. You may encounter a woman who is completely unable to take direct stimulation of her clit; the goal is still the same, but you'll have to stimulate it indirectly, such as through her labia. IMPORTANT NOTE: Often, what is unacceptably rough at first, may be fine after she's very excited. The fact is, most women really need a good bit of stimulation before a targeted attack on their clit, but once they're ready, that's where you want to devote your attention.

Back off for now, rest your head on her thigh and just admire the view. Learn to appreciate your woman's unique qualities and tell her what makes her special. Describe what you see, in poets' words if you can, but in any way you can as long as it's with love and admiration.

Positions

You can give head to your woman in just about any position she can get herself into, floating on her back in a swimming pool with her legs around your neck, standing on a picnic table, however, some positions are obviously better than others. Giving good head to your woman on a lazy summer afternoon can take an hour or more if you play it right. That means that you both have to be in comfortable positions to enjoy it, or even endure it. That usually means a lying, sitting or reclining position. She has to be able to spread her legs comfortably and hold them in that position. She should not have to have the weight of your body on her, or hers on you. She also needs to be able to put her hands on your head and pull it against her. You need to be able to make eye contact with her while you are eating her. You have to be able to press your mouth to and your tongue in all of her pussy, including holding it deep in her cunt without getting a crick in your neck. You also have to be able to easily place your hands on her pussy and your fingers in her cunt.

The obvious place to start is a bed. She can recline comfortably against some pillows and watch you work. You can lie on your stomach between her legs, however, you'll have to tilt your head too far back to get your tongue in her cunt comfortably. Putting a couple of pillows under her hips to tilt her pelvis up will help with that problem. This is probably one of the better positions. Another good one, maybe the best, is for her to slide her hips to the edge of the bed and rest her feet on two overstuffed chairs that are spread apart enough for you to rest between them. They can be turned so that she can rest her knees against the arms or backs. A couple of pillows under her head and she can reach your head and watch to her harts content. You can rest on a soft cushion on the floor, your head resting on her thigh, sucking on her clit for hours and have easy access to all of your afternoon's pleasures.

And then there's 69. . . . 69 is one of my favorite positions. On the plus side, you both get to enjoy the sublime sensations of getting head simultaneously. The upside down positioning of a woman's pussy and your mouth is an easy fit and there's more room for your hands. On the negative side, it's a less than ideal position for a woman to suck cock and you may not feel comfortable with your nose in her anus when you French kiss her cunt. I also love for a man to reach down, thrust his tongue deep in my cunt and then slowly lap it back up to my clit which doesn't work well upside down. Plus, if you need to read this posts, you may be better off concentrating your energies on pleasing her without too much distraction at first. But even for experienced 69'ers, it's easy to short-change your partner. "It feels soooo good, I'm just gonna stop for a second and concentrate on what you're . . . aaaarrrgghhh." Get the picture? Some show of willpower is in order.

She can also straddle your face which can be a lot of fun, but be prepared to get very wet. There are endless varieties of positions where you can press your face up to her pussy, some of which strike me as more acrobatic than erotic, but feel free to experiment.

Getting Started

For you gals who need instruction . . . just lie back and enjoy it, it'll grow on you. When he does something you like, tell him. Hold his head gently with your hands and guide him, talk to him, he'll love it.

Now for the men. So there you are, staring at it - the mysterious hole from whence you came, and into which you hope to cum again . . .

The key here is to go slow, ask questions, really explore her body. Body language often tells what feels best, but I promise, she'll appreciate your attentiveness if you ask outright. If she seems shy, get her to guide your hands and mouth with her own hands, and pay attention. Most women are shy about their bodies. Even if you've got the world's most gorgeous woman in bed with you, she's going to worry about how you like her body. Tell her it's beautiful, tell her which parts you like best, tell her anything, but get her to trust you enough to let you down between her legs. Women are a good deal more verbal than men, especially during lovemaking. They respond more to verbal love, which means, the more you talk to her, the easier it will be to get her off. So all the time you're petting and stroking her beautiful pussy, talk to her about it. There's nothing more exciting to a woman than to know that her partner finds her delicious. Don't be coy; tell her.

Many men, and women, feel that the tastes and odors associated with a woman's pussy are offensive. This isn't so, the natural fragrance and secretions of a healthy woman are beautiful and erotic, especially to a man. You both need to settle this question at the very beginning. Take turns tasting and smelling her pussy's natural fluids when she's fresh and clean. When you finger her and then smell, lick, suck the juice off your finger and sigh as if in heaven, she'll forget this problem and you can dive right in.

What if your sweet lady doesn't smell or taste very sweet? Don't suffer. (Don't complain, either.) Take a nice hot shower or bath together. Lather up both of your bodies and slide them together. It's like a whole body fuck. Soap up her pussy, washing between her outer and inner lips. Spread her lips apart and gently wash her clit. Hey, don't stop - this feels great! Run your soapy hand down the crack of her ass, and rub a finger all around her anus, washing the entrance/exit well. But don't put those soapy fingers up her cunt. Instead, rinse them off well and stick one or two inside, making a circular motion. Think about washing the inside of a tall glass - same thing.

She may prefer to use a douche, if she does, help her do it, you can get your fingers in her cunt later. Now wasn't that fun? Now you can feel free to let your tongue wander anywhere it pleases . . .

Even though your woman wants you to eat her, she may still be somewhat hesitant about your going down on her. Don't just dive right in, warm her up with some serious kissing and cuddling. Move over on top of her and put your legs between hers. Use your elbows to keep some of your weight off her. Slowly work your way down her body, caressing, licking and kissing her ears, eyes, throat, breasts, navel, and wherever she likes. Press your body down on her muff and slide it around as you move down, getting her used to something being on it besides your hand and cock. Lap your tongue on down from her navel to the inside of her thigh. Raise her legs over your shoulders and rest your cheek on her muff while you continue to lick and kiss her thigh. Lick the crease between her thigh and pussy. Brush your lips over her muff as you turn your head over to work on her other thigh. Look up at her, make eye contact and smile while you rub your cheek over her pussy. When you see her facial expression begin to change to one of anticipation and feel her tilt her pussy up toward you, you know she's forgotten all about her hesitancy and you can start getting into the good stuff.

So now what? You've found a comfy spot to play, you've been kissing passionately, your tongues darting around in each other's mouths like playful otters. You've moved on down to some of the other interesting parts of her body and she's starting to groan, ready for you to eat her now, grinding her pelvis against you. STOP. I know it was just starting to get good. But was she really groaning and humping you, or was it your own excitement you were detecting?

I strongly prefer to be excited before a guy starts plunging his tongue into my inner recesses. Use your judgment, women, even more so than men, love to be teased. The inner part of her thigh is one of her more tender spots. Lick it, kiss it, make designs on it with the tip of your tongue. Come dangerously close to her pussy, then float away. Make her anticipate it. Now lick the crease where her leg joins her pussy.

Nuzzle your face into her muff. Brush your lips over her pussy without pressing down on it to further excite her until she's arching up her back trying to get you to eat her. Of course, if she really was groaning and grinding, go for it . . . I also don't particularly enjoy a guy endlessly nibbling my inner thigh while my clit is quivering in anticipation.

Moisten your fingers and open her outer lips, examine them, taste the texture of the inner side with your tongue. See if her clit is starting to peek out from under its hood. Play with her inner lips with your lips and tongue. Open her inner lips and examine the vestibule. See if you can find her meatus, the opening for her urethra. Its sort of like the opening in the head of your cock that she plays with, now play with hers with your tongue. Look at the hole your cock has been playing around in. The entrance to her cunt looks like an open flower with its lower petals blending into the larger lowermost petals of the inner lips. Taste its juices with your tongue, they should be flowing now. Slip your tongue farther in and feel the texture, move it around in her cunt and watch her response.

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves again.

The Tongue

I want to repeat, there's almost nothing you can do with your tongue that won't feel terrific, so relax! I promise, you may be confused and uncertain, but she's in heaven. Any licking and sucking of her lips, cunt, or clit are going to feel just great, and I'd no sooner tell guys to "do it exactly like this" than I would tell every chef to follow the same recipe. But for those who are compelled to RTMF, here are a few techniques that you might like to try:

Play around in the vestibule, try lapping her pussy from her cunt up to her clit, leaving your tongue soft and jaw relaxed. This is a good way to start your tonguing. Run your tongue between the inner and outer lips on one side, while holding the two together with your lips. Good job, now do the other side. Fuck her cunt with your tongue - in and out, around and around, etc. This feels nice. Not wonderful or incredible or earthshaking, nice. Keep your tongue in her cunt for a while, moving the tip around and around and . . . That feels better, now lick up to her clit again and kiss it, watch her shudder. Feel the texture of the tip of her clit with your tongue, notice the taste of it. Spend some time slowly licking your tongue over all of her pussy, savoring the various tastes and textures.

Spread her outer lips with your hand. Then, with your tongue pointed and stiff, gently flick here and there. Feel free to roam, but keep coming back to her clit.

This drives some women wild, and others can't take it. Some may prefer that you always leave your tongue soft, so when you try this, pay attention to whether those moans are ecstasy or pain.

The following techniques should not be introduced until your partner is really hot (i.e., she's no longer coherent). These are very intense actions which may be "too much" for some women, even when nearing orgasm.

With her clit still exposed, give it a quick little suck - pulling it into your mouth briefly and letting it go. This is a lot like licking a bit of cake batter off of your pinky. This feels incredible, and is a fine thing to do if you feel like torturing her (see PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER below).

Take her exposed clit into your mouth and gently (at first, anyway) suck on it, simultaneously flicking your tongue over and around it. This can be done very lightly or very aggressively, and combined with fingering, will usually rapidly produce an intense orgasm.

Another choice technique involves rolling your tongue into a tube. If you can't do this with your tongue, you can't learn it - it's genetic. For those who can, this works best in an inverted or 69 position. Roll your tongue into a tube around the shaft of her clit. Slide it up and down; in effect, your tongue makes a tiny cunt for her clit to fuck. This also is likely to bring her over the edge.

Fingers

Fingers are valuable adjuncts to eating pussy. Most women masturbate by pressing a finger or fingers over their clit, possibly "thru" the skin of their lips, and vigorously rubbing in a circular or back-and-forth direction. You can do this too, ask her, or better yet, have her show you how she likes it done. You'll never be a good lover until you can bring your woman to climax with your hands. When you fuck her from behind, or really in any position which doesn't allow her to simultaneously rub her clit against your body, reach down or around and rub her clit. I know it's distracting, but just do it anyway. One important point to note: make sure that your fingers are well lubricated and most of all, your nails cut, I mean cut back to the quick and sanded smooth. The slightest hangnail can be very painful when raked over that tender flesh. There's nothing more uncomfortable (and sometimes downright painful) than a dry finger or hangnail roughly rubbed across one's clit.

Of course, that's not all you can do with your fingers. One technique which is very exciting is to spread her lips wide apart with one hand, and with your index finger straight like a pencil, flick the side of it rapidly across her clit. This motion alone will often bring a woman to orgasm. Combining this with the addition of some tongue action elsewhere is nothing short of bliss.

Sticking one or more fingers inside her cunt can also be wonderful. How many fingers you use depends on the woman. Some women don't want you to stick your finger in their cunt at all, some like only one (at least at first), some like their cunt to be full so the more the better (within reason). You can simply move them in and out (this feels best with at least two or three fingers pushed in hard) or wiggle them around. A particularly intense motion is to face your hand so that you have two fingers inside her with your palm facing the front of her body. Now move your fingers rapidly, as if waving hello. You're aiming to stimulate a particular part of the woman's vagina - namely the lower anterior (front) part. When combined with sucking her clit, this is nearly certain to bring her to a fast and intense climax.

If you're between her legs, busily eating away, and want to finger her at the same time, your thumb (or thumbs) may be the best ones to use. It is difficult to turn your other fingers around to work on her "G" spot. It also allows you to use your other fingers on her clit and the rest of her pussy.

An excellent way to begin manual stimulation is to stick one (and later two) fingers inside her, with your palm cupped over the mons area. I'm talking about that fleshy "mound" over her pubic bone. Your finger goes in and out and the ball of your hand is pressed hard against her pussy. You may want to rub or even shake the entire area with your palm.

Putting it All Together

I think variety is crucial. Some guy posted an article detailing a road map of kissing and licking (first here, then here, etc.) Much better to do the unexpected, sometimes a hungry, aggressive approach, other times a laid-back, leisurely one. You can even include your nose, or your chin in the act. Start slowly, that's the key, and let your lover guide the speed of the crescendo, try playing Ravel's Bolero and keep pace with the time and intensity of the music. In all cases, start gently. Roughness and clumsiness are big turn-offs. As she gets more excited, pay more attention to her clit. As she gets closer to orgasm, don't leave her clit for more than a moment or two. It's great to move down to her cunt and then right back to her clit. If you're between her legs with your tongue in her cunt, look at where her clit is, right under your nose. Don't just look at it, use your nose and keep up the stimulation of her clit while you're thrusting your tongue around in her cunt. If you're in the 69 position, then use your chin on her clit while you French kiss her cunt.

When she's three breaths away from cumming, moving your mouth off or away from her clit is agony. That's fine if you're intentionally torturing her, just understand that this is what you're doing. The only prohibition is to be reasonably gentle with her clit. Nibbling or biting is fine elsewhere, but we're talking about a sensitive spot.

Speaking of prolonging the agony . . . I think this is great fun. Bring your partner just to the edge of orgasm, and < stop >. This isn't easy unless you really know your lover well. Just have her help you. Say, "Grab my head and stop me just before you think you're gonna cum." Then take your sweet time. Blow on her clit, take it into your mouth just briefly, flick it just the slightest bit with your tongue. You'll have this woman squirming and moaning like she's dying. Finger her deeply, enjoy the ecstasy you're imparting, and finally, have pity. Let the poor woman cum.

OK, lets get back to where we were when we got off onto those tricks with tongues and fingers. You were lying there with your tongue up her cunt trying to find out what it felt like inside, nice wasn't it, she liked it didn't she. Open her outer and inner lips with your fingers. Get your whole mouth into the act. Press your lips against the lips of her cunt, Run your tongue in as far as you can get it and French kiss her cunt, long and hard. Tongue-fuck her for a while, watching her response, she liked that too, then slide your tongue out of her cunt. She's hot now, don't lose contact with her pussy, keep your mouth or tongue working on something. Slowly lap your tongue up the length of her vestibule to her clit and gently lick it a few times, a little harder as she raises her crotch up to you.

Play with her pussy lips with your lips and tongue, up and down, both sides. Kiss her cunt again and lap your tongue back up to her meatus and play with it a little, then on up to her clit again, pulling gently on it with your lips. Run your tongue back down to the bottom of her pussy and then, keeping your tongue on the outside of her lips, lap it all the way up to the top. Show her how much you like to eat her. Open your mouth wide and close it down over her pussy taking as much in as you can. press your mouth hard against her, rocking your head around and around while you find her clit with your tongue and start to lick it. She's running her fingers through your hair now, watching you intently, mouth open making those sexy sounds women make when they're really on the way up.

Release her lips and look up at her face, make eye contact, watch her expression and feel her raise her pussy up to you as you gently suck the head of her clit into your mouth, open wider and take its hood in, holding it with your lips. Let her clit slip back under its hood, then suck it into your mouth again, flicking it with your tongue, let it slide back out under its hood and suck it back into your mouth again and again until it's sliding in and out like she was fucking you with it. Slide your hands up along the sides of her pussy, working your thumbs into her cunt, fingering the top of it in time with the strokes of her clit. She's grabbed your head, setting the pace as she pulls you to her harder and harder, rocking her crotch back and forth faster and faster. You've found what she wants and she's gonna cum and you'd better not stop until she does . . . and then some.

69

69 can be done male on top, female on top, or side by side. The latter two are easier, though it's more restful with both partners lying down. Some women love being licked on all fours, so if female-on-top 69 drives her wild, take the hint and find ways to eat her in this position. All she has to do is slide her knees out and you'll find your mouth in her pussy. I happen to enjoy male on top, but for women who haven't learned to deep-throat, this is a sure choking position. If your woman wants to deep-throat you while you're eating her, male-on-top is THE 69 position. When her head is tilted back, especially if you're taller than she is, you can really slide your cock all the way down her throat. But don't forget what you're supposed to be doing! Each of you must realize that you can't let up on what you're supposed to be doing just because what the other is doing feels so good. Instead of letting up, let the pleasure you're feeling enhance what you're doing. It's sort of like a payback, you're making me feel so good I'm going to make you feel even better. Once you've mastered throat fucking, man on top 69 can really get interesting, he can eat you and fuck you at the same time. The only problem comes when he can't make up his mind whether to concentrate on fucking or sucking. Don't worry about it, just lie there and enjoy it, let him sort it out, he'll get around to finishing both jobs.

The element that must be in place for good 69 is simple: Both of you must be experienced! Each of you must realize that when what the other is doing feels so good, you can't just let up on what you're supposed to be doing to enjoy it. Instead of letting up, let the pleasure you're feeling enhance what you're doing, share each other's emotions. That's why, when my lover and I engage in oral sex, we like 69 so much, we can build each other's pleasure to such wonderful simultaneous climaxes.

As I said earlier, some women feel lonely when you're eating their pussy, they want something to hug. Well, you can give them something. Eat her in a side by side 69 position and let her hug your cock, with her mouth. She can put her arms around your hips, press her breasts against you and hold your cock in her mouth while you put her on cloud nine, just make sure you tell her not to distract you too much.

If you have a man who is not in the least interested in giving head and only likes to receive it, then to attempt sixty-nine is to ask for unhappiness in your relationship. You can tell if he really likes to eat your pussy. See if you can find a time when the two of you are in bed naked on your backs and he doesn't have a hard-on. Quietly roll over onto your knees, straddle his head and slowly rub your muff over his face, letting your moist lips slide over his nose and mouth. Look back at his cock. If it springs up toward the ceiling and you find his tongue in your cunt, then he likes it.

UUUUNNNNGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!! (or, I'M COMING!!!)

Okay, she's grabbed your head and pressed your face into her muff; she's practically suffocating you, she's screaming and bucking up in the air; you feel her cunt contracting wildly - how long should you keep it up?? The answer is simple, until she makes you stop. Some women may stop you after five seconds from the start of their climax, others may be able to roll right into another orgasm if you'd just keep going. Do come up for air, but remember, her excitement does not drop off as sharply as yours does. Play it safe by continuing the stimulation.

If you're sucking her clit and finger-fucking her at the same time, you're giving her far more stimulation than you would be giving her with your cock alone. So you can count on it that she's getting high on this. If there's any doubt, check her out for symptoms. Each woman is unique. You may have one whose nipples get hard when she's excited or only when she's having an orgasm. Your girl might flush red or begin to tremble. Get to know her symptoms and you'll be a more sensitive lover. When she starts to have an orgasm, for heaven's sakes, don't let go of that clit. Hang in there for the duration. When she starts to come down from the first orgasm, press your tongue along the underside of the clit, leaving your lips covering the top. Move your tongue in and out of her cunt. If your fingers are inside, move them a little, gently though, things are extremely sensitive just now. If you play your cards right, you'll get some multiple orgasms this way, a woman stays excited for an hour after she's had an orgasm.

How many times does she need to cum? Some women are very content to have one orgasm. A whole lot of women would really like to cum again, but need about five minutes to recoup. Many women are so sensitive right after they cum that they may push your head violently away. This doesn't necessarily mean they've had enough, only that you need to stop for a few minutes.

In fact most women, given a short rest between, are capable of cumming again and again. A smaller percentage of women are able to cum repeatedly with continued stimulation. This is the much-touted multiple-orgasm that's experienced by a minority of women. I know this makes it difficult to know when enough is enough, but there's a simple answer: ask her.

After you've made her cum, don't leave her alone just yet. A man can get off and go to sleep in the same breath and feel no remorse, no sense of loss. But a woman, by nature, requires some sensitivity from her lover in those first few moments after sex. Don't wipe yourself off, walk around the bed to get to the other side, go to the bathroom. Maintain close physical contact, work your way from where you were when she climaxed to holding her in your arms. Lie close together, arms and legs intertwined, wet bodies pressed close together, let your cock lie in the folds of her pussy. Talk to her, stroke her body, caress her breasts. Keep making love to her quietly until she's come all the way down, or, if nature allows, builds back up. If you've just finished my favorite 69, do some serious kissing. Taste your own juices as her tongue brings traces of it into your mouth while your tongue passes her woman's essence to her taste buds. Taste the delicious mixtures as your tongues dart back and forth, mixing the sweet cunt and cock sex juices in your mouths. Who knows what new pleasures this could lead to as your passions begin to rebuild.

GOD I'M SO EXCITED IT FEELS GREAT BUT I JUST CAN'T CUM!

It happens to all of us sometimes - distraction, embarrassment, anxiety, or just an inability to "let go." What do you do about it? The first question is, can she easily bring herself to a climax in the privacy of her own home. If the answer is no - then she needs to do some homework. There are two books on the subject that I know of: "For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality" by Lonnie Barbach, and "Sex for One: The Joy of Self-loving" by Betty Dodson; pick up one. Then tell her to read it, study it, and practice, practice, practice!

Now if your partner is orgasmic only when alone - ask her point blank: "Is there something different I can do?" Many women are shy about criticizing their lovers, but if asked outright will surprise you with a very specific answer. It may be a simple matter of mechanics, like a little to right, please, or not so rough, or more pressure and faster. Ah . . . perfect.

But suppose everything is wonderful. She says you're doing everything right but she just can't cum. There are two probable causes: self-consciousness and/or self-loathing. For women who can't help watching themselves, the best approach is to eliminate anything that focuses her attention on what the two of you're doing. This is a "be here now" kind of thing - definitely not an introspective activity. Get that mirror off the ceiling. Dim the lights or turn them off completely. Put on some soft music. Share a glass of port. (I said A glass - getting drunk will definitely not help). Have her lie on her back, or propped up comfortably with some pillows. This isn't the time for her to sit on your face, or the edge of the bed, or stand up against a wall. Arrange a time when you can devote a long period to eating her pussy, and then just keep it up. Forget everything I said about asking her questions - just close your eyes and get into it. I know this can be a difficult and exhausting exercise, but she'll be extravagantly thankful for your efforts. It gets easier each time. If all else fails, get accustomed to masturbating together. Gradually begin to add your stimulation to her own, right before she's about to cum anyway. Over time, you can take over completely.

For women who feel that their pussys are dirty or distasteful, all of the above methods may be helpful, but the underlying issue must also be addressed. I am amazed at how many women are ambivalent about their own genitals. They don't love "that part" of their body, and they can't believe that you would either. Yes, it's important to be clean. But clean means a daily shower which includes washing their pussy. It doesn't mean vainly attempting to remove every trace of smell or taste. The natural taste and fragrance of the fresh secretions from a healthy woman's pussy are beautiful and erotic. Hopefully you agree (and if not, try hard to cultivate this attitude). When she learns to love her pussy, she'll be infinitely more comfortable with your loving it too.

Menstruation

I haven't met a lot of men who are completely comfortable going down on a woman when she has her period. But some are. Most women are at their horniest before and sometimes during their period. You should definitely find a way to make her cum when she's bleeding, be it through fucking, manual, or oral stimulation. If you feel comfortable going down on her, great, it's perfectly safe. As you now know, you don't need to get anywhere near her cunt to make her cum. You may suggest that she insert a tampon, and then wash up. Or you could lay down a few old towels, turn out the lights, and forget about menstruation.

 

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